Family portraits are rarely the most exciting part of a wedding to plan, but they are the photos parents and grandparents print and keep for decades. They are also the part of the day most likely to eat into cocktail hour if nobody has a plan. With a short list and the right helper, formals can take minutes instead of an hour.
Decide when the formals happen
There are three common options, and your photographer can tell you which works best at your venue:
- Right after the ceremony. The most common choice. Everyone is dressed and in one place, but guests are waiting for you at cocktail hour, so speed matters.
- Before the ceremony. If you are doing a first look, you can photograph most family groups before guests arrive and keep only a few for after.
- Split them up. Photograph one side of the family before the ceremony and the other after, or save large extended-family groups for a moment during the reception.
Whatever you choose, put it on your wedding day timeline and tell family members exactly where to be and when.
Build a short, specific shot list
A good rule is fewer, well-chosen groupings rather than every possible combination. Photographers often suggest building from small to large, so people can be added rather than shuffled. A typical list might look like this:
- Couple with each set of parents
- Couple with each immediate family, including siblings and their partners and children
- Couple with grandparents
- Couple with each extended family group, if you want one
- Couple with the wedding party
- Any special requests, such as a godparent, a family friend or a group of cousins
Write the list with names, not just roles, since your photographer will not know who "Aunt Linda" is. Send it to your photographer a couple of weeks before the wedding, and keep a printed copy with your coordinator. If you want candid moments of family too, mention who matters most so your photographer can watch for them through the day.
Assign a family wrangler
The single biggest time saver is one person who knows the family and can gather the next group while the current one is being photographed. A sibling, cousin or friend who is comfortable calling people by name is ideal. Give them the list in advance and ask them to keep everyone nearby until formals are done. Your planner or day-of coordinator can help, but they will not know your relatives by sight.
Planning for complicated families
Divorced parents, blended families, estrangements and recent losses are common, and a little planning keeps everyone comfortable:
- Tell your photographer privately about anyone who should not be grouped together, and list separate photos for each parent and their partner.
- Include step-parents and step-siblings in a way that feels right to you. There is no single correct grouping.
- If you want to honor someone who has passed, talk to your photographer about a meaningful way to include them, such as a photo held by family or a dedicated moment.
- For relatives with limited mobility, ask about seated groupings or a spot close to the ceremony so they do not need to walk far.
Light, weather and location
Midday sun creates harsh shadows and squinting, and North Carolina summers add heat and humidity that wear on everyone quickly. Ask your photographer where they will shoot formals, and plan an open-shade or indoor option. A quick photo spot near the ceremony keeps older relatives comfortable and saves walking time. If rain is possible, agree on a covered backup location in advance. Our outdoor wedding weather guide has more on heat and storms.
Questions to ask your photographer
- How long do you typically need for formals, based on our list?
- Where would you photograph family groups at our venue, and what is the backup for rain or harsh sun?
- Would you suggest moving any groupings before the ceremony or to the reception?
- Do you bring an assistant who can help organize groups?
Our guide to choosing a wedding photographer covers styles and packages, and engagement photos are a great way to get comfortable with your photographer first. When you are ready to book, you can browse wedding photographers or search the directory by city.